Guide - Get in shape for summer

Summer is nearing... beaches, bikinis and fun is just behind the corner...

Also many of you humans think it is time for fixing up your bodies for the season of less clothing. (for us cats this is not an issue, we are always in perfect shape! as well as we do not require any clothing, our fur is just purrrfect, no matter the season)
I've made you humans a small guide about how to get in shape for summer. It is still not too late to start working on for the bikiniseason! I have not included any dietary instructions, as I trust your cats can take care of this for you according my previous guides and not let you eat anything extra.

Before starting any workout, you should do proper streching. It is good for your muscles. I am showing you here how to stretch your front legs properly. Take your time and work those muscles so they are ready for action!

If it happens that you are too lazy to do stretching, no worries, we cats work as your personal trainers too and make sure you stretch yourself well. What is better way than trying to stretch your arms under a couch to clean up a puke or find the missing catnip toy that we demand from you ? We do not place those things just randomly, we select the spots for your own good.

After nice stretching we can start the action.

Lets start by fixing your abs first. Mr. Elb is here presenting the beginning position. Then you just have to lift up your upperbody towards your knees and rinse and repeat.

The following picture demonstrates better the desired movement.

Again, if you think of avoiding the work and just sit by a couch, we are there to make sure you will get your share of workout. Like when you are sitting on the couch, we can drop a toy on the floor juuuust out of your reach so you actually have to bend to grab it. Done multiple times and you will see the results!

Working on your backmuscles is good too. There are various methods for this, but the following is my favorite. Go ahead and do the same humans! First put your rear legs on higher ground and then stretch your body towards the lowerground and then back up... the bigger distance between these two means more workout done.

Also we cats can help you out by carrying your things on top of the bookshelf and make sure you have to work those backmuscles to get them back! Includes usually also proper stretching.

Good gym equipment is essential if you prefer training this way. And also remember to ask the instructors for some help to avoid any... uncomfortable accidents...

Jogging is also a good sport to try out. But it is not to be done inside. Be brave and drag yourself outside of your house and enjoy the warming spring weather. Good shoes are a must (but we cats are not needing such unnecessities!) Mr. Elb demonstrates a startoff.

We cats also help you out inside house, by being on the otherside of the house and slowly starting to do something that you human think as "nono" just to give you enough time to start up running towards us. Also if you mention words "vet", "bath" or "meds" we usually start running away from you so you get to work out some before catching us.

Also do not forge jumping! It strenghtens your legs. Just watch you what you have under you... Like Mr. Elb makes quite a THUB sound as he lands...

Summer workout does not always have to be done on "gym", as there are various good sports to try.

Swimming as an example... as we cats do not generally like swimming, we do the movements usually on much more comfortable surroundings.Mr.Elb here practises his movements.

Boxing... this is more fun if you got two persons (or cats). And I've learned that humans like to practice boxing after evenings in bar...Good job! You are keeping yourselves in shape, but remember...alcohol is like catnip for humans and can cause some serious issues.

This word "boxing" is closely related to word "box" (that you can read more about in my previous guide) but it does not have the same meaning!

Ballgames. From soccer to baseball. We often practise you humans for this by dropping things from the shelves and letting you try to catch them in air. The faster reactions, the better. If you do not catch the "not so valuable" items, no worries, we can start dropping down your antique porcelain too! Soon you'll be on the field catching all balls in baseball!

Wallclimbing. This will strenghten all your muscles at once. But remember the safetygear... We cats got sharp nails and excellent balance so we do not require such things to slow us down.

Remember, what goes up comes down... The forces of gravity can be quite strong.

Poledancing is becoming popular sport around the world. Every cat should have their own scratching pole to use, and we like to practise often. For you human... do not use our pole, but get your own!

Yoga... it involves a lot of stretching to funny human (or cat) origami positions but none the less, it is also efficient! We cats also provide home tutoring for yoga by placing our things in hard to get places so you human actually have to go to weird positions to find them. My favorite is placing my sparkliemouse behind the tv and seeing how much effort Mommy has to do to get it out makes me feel proud of her. The positions are more than good for practising yoga.

Hunting. Many say it is not a proper sport... but I do not mean that sport with big guns. What is the fun of such thing ?! Better is the way we cats do it. We stalk our pray, shake our bottoms (this is to prepare our muscles for attack) and then jump towards the unsuspecting pray and kill it fast. We also "play" with our game afterwards, this is to provide some extra workout for our muscles. Next time you feel like eating a pheasant... hunt it down the way we cats do it. And no, no taking shortcuts and going to visit your local butcher! It is just not the same!

Fishing is not considered as a real "sport", but again, by doing it the cat way and using your hands instead of stupid fishing poles and nets and lures to catch the pray make the sport more demanding and will show results. If nothing else, after getting wet in the freezing river, you might catch a cold and that is a reason enough to stay home for a week to take care of your cats...

Ps. Using fishing equipment in aquariums is not recommended

And do not forget dancing, it will bring sweat to your skin fast and you might meet interesting people in clubs. Just before you have any stupid ideas of bringing new people to MY kingdom, remember to check that a) they like cats b) they are already at least moderately trained human slaves and c) they have no problems if I demand them something.

Also, for dancing you can test out your new summer dress and jewelry. Remember tho to get the final approval for your outfit from your cat. We cannot let our humanslaves run around looking like idiots.

Now human... go out and start getting shape for the summer... it is still not too late. I trust your cat companions will do their best to make sure you are not trying to sneak out from your workouts.